noun. the colored part of your eye.
"and i'd give up forever to touch you, 'cause i know that you feel me somehow..." -iris//the goo goo dolls
this is not a story of star-crossed lovers...
because their love was anything but doomed.
this is not a story of a soul that couldn't be saved...
because his soul was saved by her love, and her soul was saved by his.
this is not a story about many things but...
this is a story of eternal love, sadness, a moment of weakness, and immense strength.
________
have you ever looked somebody in the eye and simply felt it?
of course that feeling is never truly simple...but somehow the color of their iris burns in your soul.
imagine seeing the person you irrevocably love, imagine looking at their eyes...and how their eyes somehow become your favorite color, imagine looking into them every single day for six years.
now imagine never being able to do that again.
________
it all began in november 2009.
lucy and alonzo's relationship started to grow from a simple look, to catching feelings, to something more.
like any relationship, there were many ups and downs...but they did not let the downs keep them apart. instead, they let the lows strengthen their golden tie together.
the other's brown eyes became their favorite thing to catch... their comfort...their happiness.
my god, did they make each other happy.
my god, did they make each other laugh.
my god, did they love each other.
and that love was so close to perfect.
but of course, perfect is so blurry sometimes.
________
fast forward to 2016.
lucy and alonzo are still madly in love, incredibly happy, and honestly a fitness power couple.
they have experienced many milestones together throughout these six years.
not to mention, living together most of the years.
they are happy.
but sometimes happiness doesn't stem from multiple origins. sometimes it stems only from a few origins that are so fucking precious.
...and sometimes, people let their demons conquer their happiness.
like everybody, alonzo was taunted by his demons. like everybody, he fought them every single day.
like everybody, alonzo had a moment of weakness.
you see, sometimes demons hit you right in your "achilles heel", because more often than not, they are your achilles heel.
alonzo was not weak (anybody who ever looked at him knew this). he was physically, mentally, and emotionally incredibly strong.
he had (and still has) an invincible support system.
but his moment of weakness was different.
his moment of weakness ended his demons once and for all.
and his moment of weakness unintentionally created heartache and pain in that exact support system...
especially the unbearable heartache for the girl who had loved him for six years, for the girl who found comfort and love within his soul, his eyes, his touch, his presence.
________
on an immeasurably sad, thursday, april morning, alonzo was found dead.
________
his memory. his love. his laugh. his smile. he, in general, will live on in his loved ones hearts forever.
________
lucy loved alonzo.
and she always will.
________
lucy is incredibly strong.
the immense strength of her heart, soul, and love from her support system keeps her going.
and even though she'd "give up forever to touch him", the motivation (to do one set, one more squat, one more day) that his love once instilled within her, will keep her going.
________
rest easy, alonzo.
09.17.96-04.28.16
please know that you are loved, you are important, and you are worth it.
your life is worth it.
national suicide prevention lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
